I find myself caught in this horrible circle: I tell myself every day that I don’t want to post, comment or write about Chick-fil-A and marriage equality. And then I see things that annoy me. And here I am.
First, I’m really frustrated that the fight for my equality is now being waged in the context of a fast food chain. Talk about demeaning. There was a point when the comments/reactions made sense and then things just sort of nose-dived into extremism. So now, here we are talking more about chicken than about the logical reasons I should be able to get married to the man I love one day just as men and women do each day. And somehow, freedom of speech has now become the main talking point, it seems. I get that some groups were actually challenging the CEO’s freedom of speech, so I can definitely see it being a part of the conversation — just not the entire conversation.
Next, I spent Wednesday sick in bed, occasionally checking social media to see TONS of updates from “friends” who were going to CFA to show “appreciation” and from “friends” who were aghast at such a display. I saw update after update from gays about how true Christians would have organized clothing drives for the needy or donated to food banks or given money to homeless shelters. And then, two days later, someone decides that the best way to stand up to Chick-fil-A is to have a bunch of people go into the restaurant chains, kiss members of the same sex, take pictures/video of it and put it on Facebook. Talk about vanity. Really? Take a picture of yourself kissing your significant other/friend of the same sex inside a restaurant? Really? I love my boyfriend and I love to show him affection, at home and in public. But not arbitrarily. It cheapens the action and it cheapens the cause. I see nothing productive happening from a “kissing day.” They already knew we were gay, guys. They already knew we existed. They have gays that work there. I just don’t get it. I mean I see the points others have made in support, but so far, I find it all faulty.
But wait — this doesn’t mean Wednesday’s “appreciation” day was perfect. Oh no no. Where do I even begin? OK — let me think of this as a follower of Jesus. I’m pretty sure I’ve been trained enough for this. And I use “follower of Jesus” instead of “Christian” very specifically. Chick-fil-A is already making plenty of money. Half the people who went were probably already planning on clogging their arteries there sometime this week anyway. Just not on Sunday, of course. The biggest, most widespread message I’ve heard from “Christians” is that the point of this day was to show “appreciation” for the CEO’s public stance. Some went to apparently support his right to free speech. Others went because they agree that gay people shouldn’t exist. And yes, that’s what this CEO is essentially saying, no matter how he sugarcoats it. But part of this message has also been that Christians “love everyone.” It’s “love the sinner, hate the sin,” as I’ve so often been told. When Jesus wanted to prove a point, though, did he go to the people who supported him to show more support? No. Jesus seemed to think — from what I recall — that one shows what’s right and supports what’s right simply by demonstrating these ideals naturally in life. And one seeks out people in love to show them. Not to ram a message of hate down their throats, but to support them. He preferred the black sheep, not the religious leaders. What did all those preachers I heard saying that in sermon after sermon think it meant? You can’t just SAY you love everyone and follow it up with words and actions of hate. Well, you can. But then I’m not sure you’re paying attention to that “WWJD” bracelet. Instead of reaching out to the gay community to start a dialogue about things or to spend a few bucks feeding a homeless dude or donating canned goods to a food bank or even donating a few hours of time to spruce up a community, “Christians” decided to go eat. There must be Christians somewhere else in the world thinking that Americans are dumb as hell, just as there must be a group of gays somewhere else thinking we’re silly, too.
The bottom line is this is all silly. This is a deviation. This is not a “we can coexist moment.” I’m tired of “Christians” claiming that there’s some sort of massive gay oppression of Christianity going on. THINK about what you’re doing: You’re outwardly being hateful, saying we shouldn’t exist, and demanding laws to demonize us and keep us unequal. When we fire back by BOYCOTTING a FOOD chain that donates MILLIONS to continue said OPPRESSION, we’re attacking you? No. We’re fighting back against YOUR attacks. Wanting equality isn’t attacking. It has nothing to do with you. I don’t know how many different ways to say that my marriage won’t impact you at all. I guess if I wrapped my words in a hamburger bun, it’d be easier for you to “appreciate.”
I don’t understand why people can’t just THINK. Reverse the situations. We’re not trying to gain marriage equality and stop YOU from getting married. We’re just trying to show our love in a legal forum. Religion has no place here — not for everyone. This doesn’t even make sense if you think being gay is a sin. America isn’t run on “sins.” It’s run on laws. Laws to protect everyone.
And as for the gays — making out in a fast food restaurant, taking a pic, and running off does nothing. It makes you look just as silly as the bigots who think they’re simply “appreciating” a company for supporting oppression within governmental constraints.
I don’t want to join your church. I don’t want to be your friend. I don’t want to indoctrinate your kids. I just want to get married one day. And instead of being anywhere near a discussion on that, we’re writing about food. Typical America.